O lovely dishcloth
Thou art so fun to knit
In thy multihued splendor
Thou scrubeth the pots
But leave no mark upon their vulnerable surface
Thou understands their tough defenselessness
My eyes light upon thee
And perceive bliss
I could gaze upon thy textural symphony for hours
And never become tired
Of thy simplistic grace
If only our troubled world
Could be more like thee
Whoa—poetry of sheer Vogon proportions. Of course we need the photo collection to accompany it.
In case you’re keeping track, that’s one dishcloth. I suppose I’m waxing so (ahem) poetic about it because it’s been so simple, so fun, so addicting to knit.
I’m seeing a quite a contrast here.
That’s Steggy! That piece of stretched out knitting is his left side. Now I have to knit his right side. Those are seamed together. Then I will knit his four legs, which are seamed together. Then comes the top of his feet, which are knit separately from the bottom of his feet, which are seamed together. Then his scales, which are knit in two pieces each, then seamed together. The spikes are also knit flat, then seamed together. The little foot claws are knit flat, then seamed together. Oh I forgot! The “head gusset” is also knit separately, then seamed together with the other two sides of the head.
Are you getting the general message here? If not, I will translate for you: the Patons company wishes to know if the KnitPicks needles are sharp enough to actually pierce the human heart. I’m betting yes, and I’m also betting that I will attempt to find out at least once.
Okay, let’s take a step back, here. Are all these seams really necessary? I understand that many people subscribe to the “seams give a knitted object structure” argument, and I can see the point, to a certain extent. But come on, Patons! There are almost as many seams as knitted stitches in this thing! Oh, and did I mention that there’s no schematic for sewing it together in the end? It says, and I quote directly, “Join body pieces together, starting from lower jaw line and down neck, continue along tummy, leaving a small opening, then around tail, joining head gusset with top part of head.”
I’m thinking that’s a little on the vague side. Yes, I’m sure I can figure it out when I’ve got all the pieces in hand, but I think just a teensy little picture would help a lot, without adding much length to the pattern. It would also aid tremendously if someone wanted to, say, knit both body pieces together so they could eliminate one of approximately 10,000 seams. That’s strictly hypothetical, of course.
Ach. Oh well. I’ve started it their way and I guess I’ll finish it their way. I haven’t found any more errors in the pattern after those first three, which is heartening.
But all those seams! Oh my gosh. I think I need lay down.
Oh, in case anybody still wants to knit this thing, the only source I’ve found for the booklet is here. Knock yourself out.