1. Shock and Denial

extra boobage room

This sweater is okay, right? It’s not too big in the boobs. It’ll block out. I don’t need to rip it. It’s fine. It fits.

not too big. no way

The armholes are just perfect, too. Lots of extra room, in case I start lifting weights. Or go into bodybuilding.

2. Pain and Guilt

Dude. This is 3/4 of a sweater. Do you know how long I’ve been working on this? That I put it down LAST YEAR, just to eff it up and have to rip back to about where I started from? FECK!

more extra boobage room

Oh man! I don’t want to re-knit this. What if I screw it up again? Plus I want to start a NEW sweater, not knit this one over again. Whine! No fair!

3. Anger and Bargaining

Look, you stupid piece of shit sweater–this is your fault. You tricked me! I thought once I got more weight below the bust part, the knitted fabric would pull down more! But it doesn’t! You suck!

too much curve

Okay. Okay, okay. How about this: I’ll get a push-up bra. One of those that adds…two cup sizes. I’ve always wanted to be a DD.

4. Depression, Reflection, Loneliness

I keep spreading you out on my lap. You’re so pretty! Why don’t you fit?

...but it's so pretty!

It would be so great if you could just…oh man, I can’t do anything right, can I? It’s just a dumb top-down raglan sleeved sweater! They’re supposed to be easy! But no, I go and screw it up royally. Jeez, is anybody as dumb as me? I tried it on every few rows! How could it possibly not fit?

5. The Upward Turn

So I started a new pair of socks. Barber Pole socks, from the last Twist Collective. (Yarn is Claudia’s Handpaints in grape jelly.) No, I haven’t ripped yet. I’m just…working on the socks. I like how they’re turning out so far. Pretty! I’m not totally worthless. I can do some stuff.

springy sock

6. Reconstruction and Working Through

So I guess the problem is that four extra stitches I cast on below the arms. If I just rip back to that part, I can fix it.

about how much I can get rid of

Actually just above that, so I can make the armholes slightly smaller. I think it’ll work.

7. Acceptance and Hope

Sure it’s a lot of work lost, but I can make it right, actually pretty easily. And it will be better in the end. Perfect, even.

I guess that’s all. Excuse me, I have some frogging to do.

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